Oftentimes, we believe we need to “add something” into our lives to be happy … more money, better job, a spouse, a new car, a baby. The truth is, by removing things, we create the space to find more happiness in the simple things. It’s in the simplicity that happiness finds its way into the cracks of ordinary moments that we tend to take for granted.
Here are three things you need to eliminate from your life to feel more happiness each day.
The Need to Please Others
It’s not possible to please everyone all the time. It’s not even possible to please any one person most of the time. The level that someone may or may not feel pleased by someone or something is entirely up to that individual. You have nothing to do with it… sorry, it’s the truth. Therefore, doing things because we think it will please another is the wrong reason to be doing it. The only reason to do it is because YOU want to do it JUST FOR YOU! If you’re doing it to elicit a response, you can expect to be disappointed often, which won’t leave you feeling happy.
For you, you need to do things that make YOU happy and let go of how others feel about it. If it makes you happy, then the people in your life who truly love and care about you will be supportive of you. If they are not, well, there is a good chance you shouldn’t be spending time with them any longer anyway. Doing for others, whether it be something for them or you do because of what they may think, will leave you feeling sad and disappointed far too often.
Stuff happens… constantly. Technology breaks. Kids get into trouble. You get a flat tire. People cancel plans on you. Schedules get moved around. Restaurants run out of your favorite meal. The one constant in life is change. If you’re too structured and rigid in the way you live and in your views, that is a guaranteed detractor of happiness. Let go and let flow. Being flexible allows you the opportunity to pivot and change direction, without it affecting your day in a negative way. By being more flexible and relaxed, you’ll start to notice some more of the magic that shows up in your life by all the “coincidences” that show up. For instance, if you weren’t stuck in traffic and late for your appointment, which set your day back a bit, you wouldn’t have run into that old friend you haven’t seen in years. Just trust…there are no accidents. Everything happens for a reason, even if you don’t know it in the moment. So, do your best to relax and be flexible.
Nothing is ever really done, and there really is no such thing as perfection. What may look like perfection to one person looks like a disaster to someone else. Once the house is perfectly clean, all it takes is the kids to come home and one meal to be cooked in thue kitchen, and in an instant, no more perfection. Have you ever noticed that the “To Do” list never gets done? You may be able to check off all the items in one given day. But, sure enough, there’s more “To Do” the next day. When you pause for a moment and realize this fact, you can stop and congratulate yourself for what you actually DID accomplish and spend less time beating yourself up for what didn’t get completed yet. It’s in those moments of choosing to feel the accomplishment where your bliss is. Release the attachment to be always “doing, doing, doing.”
These may seem simple, but it is in the simplicity of life where our joy resides. So, give it up and make yourself happier.